5 JRPGs that need their own Advent Children
by M.D. Harle
In a post Final Fantasy VII Remake world, Final Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children’s existence has somewhat fallen by the wayside.
Most cynically, the film could be looked at as an unnecessary cash-in on a once-sacred video game that has no right to exist.
To be fair, most tie in ‘anythings’ in today’s day and age don’t artistically justify their own existence, but people love eating the slop so much that we’ve got nothing but sequels, spin-offs, and remakes in all forms of media for over a decade.
Advent Children falls under this ON PAPER, but in actuality, it secretly remains one of Square Enix’s biggest accomplishments and if not the best at least the most 3DCG animated film ever made.
In less grandiose terms, Advent Children imagines ‘what if a PS2 pre-rendered cutscene was, like, an entire darn movie’ and by god’s grace where it falls flat ‘as a cohesive film’ or ‘as an extension of FF7’ it makes up for in pure Playstation 2 era Square Enix adrenaline and magic.
So, we’ve put together a list of other JRPGs that we’d love to see an Advent Children for but we want to clarify; We’re not just talking about ‘a tie in movie’ in the loosest sense.
Those exist, you can watch the piece of butt Bayonetta movie and that piece of double butt Ni No Kuni movie.
No, we want to specifically see ‘Advent Children-a-likes’, for which we have some specific qualifications;
The movie must not only be made with computer generated polygonal animation but with the texture and spirit of fancy video game cutscenes.
Style over substance. There’s no way you could meaningly add to a fully realized JRPG experience with an extra 90 minutes of runtime. Therefore, these need to indulge in the aesthetics of such things.
I’m not saying these have to be Square Enix made games and films, but they’re probably going to be.
With that, here’s our darn list.
No no, we aren’t just going to choose 5 other Final Fantasies to populate our dumb listical with.
As the second coolest, if not coolest, Final Fantasy though, we deserve to see PS2 Square Enix FMV quality Squalls running around with PS2 Square Enix FMV quality gunblades making a darn mess of the whole world.
In my Ideal Final Fantasy VIII: Advent Children, instead of getting weird Seifer clones we’d get weird variant Squall clones with even weirder variant Gunblades.
Whose with me?
Nier, Nier Automata, an Advent Children type beat movie would work well for either game.
The latter has an anime coming out so for the time being we’ll just pitch a film where Kaine goes around saying a lot of naughty words at weird spirity guys or maybe some robots in a hyper stylistic series of cutscenes.
Great idea, me!
Perhaps a prequel would make more sense than an active sequel in this case with how things typically end in these games, but man do we love the ‘Final Fantasy X of Shin Megami Tensei games’ and a film about Post Apocalyptic Trendy RPG Character Demon Gang Warfare wouldn’t be the worst way to spend 2 hours.
Mostly I just want to see Cielo’s lavender-blue dreads with higher quality lighting, don’t you?
Not TECHNICALLY a JRPG but whatever; Give us a properly Kojima scripted ninja Raiden jamboree.
Give this one 3D screenings.
Let Raiden slice *me* in half as I watch him. I would say thank you, may I have another sir.
God this would be so cool. Pure Y2K nonsense nectar.
Beam me in. Take me to Tekno God. *Gawrsh*